Hearts were never meant to race

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My hobbies include trying to close the elevator door before someone else gets on

(via spinningfast)

i haven’t been to subway in 2 years cos the woman went “what bread do you want” and i went “yeah”

(Source: grotbag, via spinningfast)



what if childbirth is just the pain of the 9 periods you missed

and all this time i thought it was the baby ripping through your vagina

(Source: phanfrickintastic, via spinningfast)